Selling Soulfully with Jennifer Allan


Online Dating - the Quality versus Quantity Approach...

A good friend of mine dabbles in the online dating world from time to time. And as an old married woman, I get to enjoy the “fun” of singlehood vicariously through her dating adventures, online and otherwise.

Anyway, the other day she sent me a promotional email she received from a new online site she’s trying out – basically, it’s a form letter the site graciously supplies that, with the touch of a button, you can send out to “thousands of other singles” introducing yourself to get the romantic ball rolling.

Um, well.

My friend had already received a few of these introductory form letters and was, shall we say, less than impressed. Call us sensitive, but we women like to think that a man who has an interest in us might actually take the time to peruse our profile (yes, I’ve been out there too) to see if, indeed, there is some potential for romance…and then take the “trouble” to actually comment on something they saw there.

Okay, okay, I know the argument. Dating is a numbers game and the more stuff you throw against the wall and all of that, but don’t we say the same thing about marketing our businesses? And then implement the stuff-throwing and numbers-gaming strategies… and wonder why they don’t work? Or why we feel like we’re doing more annoying-the-public than inspiring-the-public (to support our business)?

There IS a better way! Yes, it takes more time and energy to approach ONE person at a time, whether that’s with a “I’d like to know more about you” note or a “I’d like to see if I can help you” offer, but at the end of the day… would you rather have annoyed (or been ignored by) 100 potential mates/clients… or impressed one?

And imagine if you “impressed” one person a day…for a year… versus annoyed 100 people a day…for a year…

Impressed approach: 365 people who think you’re cool

Annoyed approach: 36,500 people who think you’re annoying (or have totally forgotten about you).

Here’s a blog I wrote a few years back on the subject... 

Looking for Love or Clients: Here’s One Approach (NOT!)

It's Here!


The More Fun You Have Selling Real Estate, the More Real Estate You Will Sell! 
(True Story)
Order Your Here!









Comment balloon 8 commentsJennifer Allan-Hagedorn • June 30 2014 06:41AM


This is hilarious.  When I was much younger, single and before internet dating I was having trouble meeting eligible single guys so my room mate placed an ad in the personal ads in the local paper.  I got tons of responses.  She was an English major and working on her Master's in Education so, in true English major fashion we set to grading each letter on spelling, grammer, content and whether or not they included a photo.  One liners automatically got a D and so on.  I only contacted the A's.  It was fun and I did go out on several dates but nothing interesting came of it.

Posted by June Piper-Brandon, Piecing Dreams One Home at a Time (Houwzer Inc) over 6 years ago

As a recent widow....I've signed up for had my "dating" picture taken by a professional photographer and will be assembling my profile and bio pictures over this will be a hoot to see who responds to my full blown entry!

Posted by Wallace S. Gibson, CPM, LandlordWhisperer (Gibson Management Group, Ltd.) over 6 years ago

Wallace - I met my current husband on!!! 


June - Glad you enjoyed it! 

Posted by Jennifer Allan-Hagedorn, Author of Sell with Soul (Sell with Soul) over 6 years ago

Good Stuff!! G

Posted by Glenn S. Phillips, CEO, Lake Homes Realty / (Lake Homes Realty) over 6 years ago

Thanks...I tried a few of them but there's a ton of sites now. Its funny the ones I like don't respond, and the ones that respond to me I am not interested. Key is to have patience and be realistic.

Posted by Dennis Swartz, MBA, GRI...experience counts! (Full Circle Property Management) over 6 years ago


God is sovereign in what happens with sites like or e-harmony. Hope all is well with you. Haven't seen a blog from you in a while.

Posted by Les & Sarah Oswald, Broker, Realtor and Investor (Realty One Group) over 6 years ago

What do you guys think about sites that promote cheating?

Posted by David Saba over 6 years ago

I do believe dating is like homebuing process. You have to know exactly what you want and what you qualified for:) 

Posted by Inna Ivchenko, Realtor® • Green • GRI • HAFA • PSC Calabasas CA (Barcode Properties) over 4 years ago

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