Selling Soulfully with Jennifer Allan

First, allow me to apologize for dragging this Monkey Series* on too long. I really didn't intend to write more than one or two posts on it, but I just keep thinking of things to say! I was hoping this would be the last one, but I suspect it's not. Hang in there with me, k? I really AM trying to get to my point.

Yesterday, I wrote about CONTROL. Specifically, which issues of a real estate transaction (i.e. Monkeys) YOU control; which ones your CLIENT controls and which ones neither of you has any say over. My point in spelling it all out wasn't to give anyone permission to be snotty with a buyer or seller when he tries to hand off his Monkey; no, I just wanted to clarify which Monkeys are appropriate to decline. ("Declining the Monkey" means to refuse to accept responsibility for problems that are not yours to solve.)

If you didn't read yesterday's blog, please do so here. The rest of this won't make much sense if you don't - sorry. And while you're at it, read this one, too.

Believe it or not, politely declining to take on your clients' monkeys has a lot to do with respect. Respecting your CLIENT'S intelligence, abilities and willingness to do his part. Acknowledging that your client has a brain and a checkbook, and that he can probably find some free time. A lot of us don't seem to give our clients the benefit of the doubt that they are willing or able to do their part, so we either offer to do it for them or walk away frustrated.

Sure, an upside-down seller will be more than happy to dump his upside-down monkey on you, if you agree to take it. A frustrated buyer would be tickled to let YOU figure out where that extra 5% down is going to come from when the terms of his loan change. But you CAN gracefully hand that monkey back to the buyer or seller without his ever noticing the hand-off!

Let's use the example from my initial blog of the seller who owes $415,000 on a house that might be worth $399,000. To come out whole, he really needs to sell around $430,000. Oh, and he DOESN'T want to come to the table with money or short sell the house.

What do you do?

Of course, you can refuse to take the listing, and indeed, that's what you might end up doing. Or you might agree to take the listing at a too-high price, and regret it every day for the next six months. But are those the only two options?

NO!

There is another solution to this problem. One that may result in a sellable listing. What IS this magic solution?

I dunno.

It's your seller's solution to discover. And if you let him keep his monkey, he may very well come up with the solution on his own. Maybe he'll decide to kiss up to Aunt Lulu and ask her for a short-term loan to cover the spread. Maybe he'll decide a short-sale isn't out of the question. Maybe he'll agree to make the improvements you recommend to give him a better shot at a higher price.

Or maybe he'll come up with something brilliant none of us thought of.

But... but... but... how DO you show your prospect or client the respect of letting him keep his own monkeys? What do you say? Or not say?

You know the drill... stay tuned...

*I didn't make up the Monkey concept - Terry Watson did. You can purchase Monkey t-shirts at his website: http://www.terrywatson.com/Products/Apparel.asp

The other day I had a three-way conversation with two agents who are in the middle of career crises. Both are trying to decide whether to stay or go, interestingly, for opposite reasons. AgentFriend1 has too much business and is burning out and AgentFriend2, well, doesn't. Have too much business, that is. And she's burning out, too.

We talked about burnout and both agents confessed that they become deeply involved in their clients' personal situations and get sucked into the emotional drama of it all. Which isn't uncommon in our business; after all, we ARE deeply involved in the whole mess - if our seller doesn't have enough equity to properly price; if our buyer's loan changes and they have to come up with an additional 5% down; if our listing doesn't appraise and the deal crashes... yes, these events DO affect us both financially and emotionally. And frankly, if they didn't affect us, we probably wouldn't be effective at our jobs.

But you can draw a line and preserve your sanity. Terry Watson calls it "the Monkey." He describes how we wrongly let others put their monkeys on our backs - even though we have our own monkeys to deal with, thank you very much! We real estate agents are really good at accepting our clients' monkeys as our own.

And you know what? Our clients are HAPPY to give us their monkeys and then blame us when things go wrong. Further, we accept that blame - which puts us in a position where we have to apologize for our inability to solve a problem that ISN'T OURS TO SOLVE.

Here's an example. The seller owes $415,000 on his home. The market value is no more than $395,000 and that's pushing it. In order to break even, the seller needs to sell at $430,000 at least. The seller "doesn't want to do a short sale," so he looks to his agent for another solution. What solution does the agent come up with?

1.       Price at $439,900 and hope for a miracle

2.       Reduce her commission to nothing and price at $420,000 (and hope for a miracle)

Of course, there are other solutions, but we monkey-acceptors want to please, so these are the ones we propose. (And then we're miserable because we have an unsellable product, but that's another story).

Here's another example. You interview for a tenant-occupied listing. The seller doesn't want to inconvenience the tenant, so he asks for a 24-hour showing requirement; for day-time showings only; that you attend all showings, and a 60-day possession. You want to please the seller, so you agree, knowing what he's asking will make the properly unmarketable... and you miserable.

Do too many of these deals and I think burnout IS an inevitability.

Of course, it's easy to advise "Well, just thank the %$SOB^# very much for the opportunity and walk away!" I hear that advice all the time, and sure, that's an option. But there's a better way... a way to respectfully decline the monkey and move forward without alienating someone who could be a wonderful client and future referral source.

Stay tuned...(actually, you might have to wait a week for the sequel - I'm heading out for my vacation tomorrow and have been duly informed that I will NOT spend my vacation on the computer. But maybe I can sneak it in!)

The Monkey Series
Part II Which Monkeys Are Yours? Which Aren't?
Part III Declining the Monkey Part III
Part IV What to Say (or not say) to Decline the Monkey
Part V A real world example of a Monkey Unnecessarily Accepted